Friday, May 24, 2013

Got Poo?

I'm starting to believe that most of the world troubles could be solved with poop! 

Moles in the yard... put doo-doo down the holes, they go the opposite direction.  Works for chipmunks too.

Dogs digging in the yard... put their bum brownies in the holes and cover it up, they won't dig there again.

People park in front of your house, cut through your yard because they are lazy and don't want to use  the parking lot.  We need a visual.
1. My House.
2. Where people park and cut through to the ...
3. T-ball fields.

So they park where that number 2 is (very fitting you'll see), I see them and when they are cutting through my yard... I nicely say, "Please don't park there. The Y is suppose to tell you not to park in our cal-du-sac."  They have 4-5 year olds with them..... and I hear...

"It's a free country."
"You don't own the street."
"I live in this neighborhood."

The men get belligerent, men don't like to be told they can't park places I guess.  I just shut up... hard to believe I know... but I got poo!  Kenny shits like a horse, and top that off with two labs, God knows I have enough of it!

I go to their car and place the colon cannon balls in front of the driver door and passenger door.  In the grass because I know that 4-5 year olds don't look for Hell's candy.

However, if the person has been a jerk and said, "I can park where I want!" or any of of the above smart ass phrases, I do the surround...

I put anal output by all four doors and right under the tires so they have to roll over it. Nothing says, "You're a shithead." like your car and garage smelling of feces.

Once I was lucky enough to hear the daughter, of one of the guys that yelled at me, shriek , "Ewww, I just stepped in poo!" I know you want to say, why drag their kids through this crap?  But since the parents don't seem to mind yelling at me in front of their kids, I don't mind getting bun fudge on their kids shoes so they will have to clean it up. 

Enough talk of dung, I need to go out and de-fecalize the yard so I can mow.

May your day be filled with sunshine and unicorns!

Michelle
... and yes, there is this delightful webpage called "The Poop Thesauraus."


Friday, May 17, 2013

Ian flew the nest and I got his closet!

Okay, I'm back... hopefully for good this time, or till life gets in the way again.   Since my last post was about a headboard Scotty and I made...... I will start with the desk to match the headboard we just finished to put in Ian's old room.  Ian graduated last December, and started a new job in January.  He is a Software Developer for a company called Sonoma Partners in Chicago.  Yep, he flew the nest ... big time, he's now in an apt. 200 miles north of us in Evanston, Il.  He's doing great, loves his job, so much so... he has only been to the lake once (when his dad and brother visited in April) which is just five blocks down his street. 

Since a desk is a wee bit less emotional.... later I will get to my furbaby Kenny we got last September :) , and my sister Renee who we lost in February.   :(  

So... Ian took his furniture he had since he was about 5. Ian didn't want to take his furniture since he was sick of it... but I said, "Where you going to put your socks?"  When the movers came, out went the bedroom furniture, along with my sofa and chair.... another story.

Here's his room...
He took his full-size bed off to college and we got a queen for in there and Scotty and I made the Macaroni Grill (post below) headboad for it.
So now he is gone, and I have no furniture in there except a bed.  Brian works a lot, especially on the weekends, he usually goes in the basement and works at the bar down there. So I thought it might be nice if he got to look out a window once in a while.  Scotty and I went wood shopping, I drew out what I wanted on a napkin, and Scotty planned on how he would put it together.
That's it on his kitchen table (yep he made that too) waiting for some corner and L brackets.  If that red ribbon comes off, it all crumbles.... don't ask me how I know that.  I never see Scotty happier than when he is playing with wood... oh wait...... playing with chopped down trees cut into nice long planks.
Once I got it,  all nice and sanded with routed edges...... I stained and put some poly on it.  Then I had to add some details so it matched the head board.  Which was heavy paintable wallpaper, and the iron scrolls for the inner corners and some trim.  Total cost was around $75.   Brian picked out his own chair since he has to sit in it...... me..... I would of went with something cuter. :)
So Ian's old bedroom is now a guest bedroom and work space for Brian.  I painted just the one wall with the stenciled black squares and made it orange....... toffee cream if you want the exact color, and YES, I did gravitate towards the color since it was named Toffee...... I figured it was mean to be!  I painted the wall with a flat coat, then stenciled over it in the same color but a semi-gloss.  It's very subtle, you can actually see it better in the pic than in the room.
 
I got some 12x12 frames, and matted with scrapbook paper and some images of Chicago landmarks... Field Museum, Lincoln Park Zoo and the Shedd Aquarium, places Brian and I went on dates.
 
And since it was the room Ian spent years 13 to 22, I wanted it to still be his in a way.
So I made a little homage to him.
 
I still have some wicker shelving from the family room to bring in there, but first need to find a bargain to replace them in the family room.... these things take time and luck.
 
And yes...... I took over Ian's closet..... and Brian did too.  It's now a nice new home for whatever clothing is out of season...... and shoes..... lots and lots of shoes!  Like these...
 

love these... got for $100 bucks off on Ebay. They make snow flakes in the snow!
 
I've been told women over 50 shouldn't wear over the knee boots, you need to ignore these people. Wear whatever you want!
 

I have a feeling it goes for black suede with a nice heel too
 

I thought Brian was going to make fun of these, but it's actually the first pair he said he liked! lol
 
I liked the tall ones so much, I had to buy the short ones, they too make snowflakes!
 

 
..another deal too good to pass up.
 
....you get the idea! 
Mmmmmmmm shoes!
 
Thanks for taking the time! :)
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 







 

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